New year new me

This New Year I will have no resolutions. Why wait for Jan 1st. My goals I have realised, and what better time to start than now? All year round I know what I should do, what I want to do, and what I need to do. So for 2010, I will not make hype about changing myself. I will be the same Me. Like fine wine I will be better as each second, minute, hour, day, week, month, year passes.

Too much

Is it too much to ask you for you?
All of you as you are.

Is it too much to ask to hear you say good morning?
Awakening my spirits, wishing me good day.

Is it to much to ask to see you smile at me?
Beautiful expression showing your happy to see me.

Is it too much to ask feel your arms around me?
To feel the warmth and security of your embrace.

Is it too much to ask to smell your cologne?
A comforting scent that heightens my arousal.

Is it too much to ask to taste your lips?
With one sweet kiss, an exchange of emotional bliss.

Is it too much to say I miss you?
Should I expect to here that you miss me too?

Is it too much to say that I've fallen in love with you? Tho at this point I wish I could fall out of it. Wish I could move on. Soon enough and in due time I will.
Once I move on...

Will you ask for me.
All of me as I am?

Will you want to say good morning?
But have lost touch with me.

Will you want to see me smile?
Only to have the memory captured in a photo.

Will you want to smell my perfume?
Instead to have the stale smell of NY air invade your nostrils.

Will you want to feel me rub your back?
Only to feel a chill as you remove your shirt.

Will you try to recapture the taste of my kiss.
Long lost and no longer lingering.

Will time be enough to fade these feelings?
Will it answer these questions?

Dream rescue me. I yearn for you to console me.

Wrap me in your strong hold and rock me to sleep.

To feel your warmth as I nestle in your embrace.

Caress my cheek, kiss my face.

Take me to the utopia, ohh such a beautiful place.

What happened?

Sigh, Ho hum is how I feel. Or do I feel at all? Things just went flat. And somber is my mood. I'm so confused. A lil angry at times. Then sorrow. Was sorry for too long. Now acceptance.

Things started out on a high note. Now the music is lost. Where is that melody that was so sweet? Before my clumsy finger hit the wrong key. And then once again I pitch the wrong note. What's wrong with me? I thought I knew this song. It plays beautifully in my mind. But my ears hears the all to awful tune.

Reality sets in. I guess some songs are not meant to be played. Or is it just the wrong song at the wrong time? No one wants to hear a 50cent jam at a funeral.
Sigh...

Hazel's born day

The day is Monday July 13th. In 4 days I will turn 25. Wow 25 years of
life. Let me thank the Lord for life. He gives me strength each day, to
wake up, go to work, spend time with my family, spend time alone, and
rest each night with faith in my heart that he will hold me in my
slumber and gently rouse me the next day. And for the past 11,315 days
(yes I have calculated even the leap years) I awake to go on another day.

What to do for the big day? The actual day of my birthday I will relax at home until my time to go to work. Yes I will work that day, the request for the day off could not fulfilled. But bitter I am not, the following week will be my birthday bliss. 10 days to do what I please. Instead of how may I please. Going to the beach may be on the agenda. Just need some summer heat. Hang with my bestie, catch up on girl talk. Special time with Mr. Green. I'm sure he has something up his sleeve. Fun times with my family. Lets all eat drink and be merry. Sleep and pampering for myself. Can't wait to take these braids out. Get a fresh do. Paint my fingers and toes, get all girly like.

Now its just me and the clock. Counting down the days. I better not blink, cause if I do it will all be over too soon. Count my blessings, and keep them in my focus. For the days when I don't feel 100%. I will keep in mind how blesses I am. Live on and be strong and wake each day and have hope for another 25, 50, 75, 100 years

One man woman

I love this blogg and wanna take the time out to reblogg. The words describe the mutual feelings shared between us.

when we're apart thoughts of HIM haunt me. i know it sounds crazy but its like HE'S a part of me. in the streets or under covers my baby's my equal, there is no other. we were made for each other. like a poet and his pen. an egg and a hen. tied to each other for ever. break up, what. apart, quote the raven, never more. wasn't sent from heaven, my angel came from brooklyn. HIS block look like crooklyn. HE WAS THE NICE GUY WHO THOUGHT HE FINISHED LAST. NO NEED TO RACE, JUST TOOK THE BLINDFOLD OFF MY FACE. WAS SCARED TO LET YOU IN,but YOU scaled the wall, wanna know what im about, the writings on the wall. like peanut butter and jelly, mac and cheese, we complement each other. so whenever we get the chance we compliment each other. HE'S my day im HIS night together we make the sun rise. not just my world, HE comprises my galaxy. you just don't understand, HE means that much to me. i love my MAN, i need my MAN. we're apart right now, damn i miss my MAN. HE needs my love so ima give it to HIM. HE gave me strength and peace of mind so ima give it to HIM. its almost our time to shine so we stay on our grind. food for thought, life's short. why just try to bust it baby. the best part of me since HE became a part of me. since we been together i hate when HE'S a part from me. HE may not be the air i breath but when we are apart i cant breath. my lungs run on love now, l O ve2 now...
Posted by R Green III at 1:30 PM

Modification

The change in me will take time to complete. Each day I will keep my goals in mind. Keep my motivation strong. Block out all the things that try to hold me back. Disentangle myself from elements that are holding me back.

Jumping over hurdles are not always easy. Although once you've gotten over the first manacle, the fear of what may follow will fade away. Fear overcome transforms into confidence. Confidence transitions into ambition.
I will be a driven force, breaking thru any wall built as a hindrance. I will reach my mark, without looking back. Moving forward towards new experiences. Refining the woman who is me.

Beautiful spring day

Its a beautiful spring day and the world seems bright. I am walking to
the train, the sun is shinning. The birds are flying. The warm air feels
great. Finally the winter coat can retire. To some its a perfect
picture. To me it like a puzzle. You know the one where you find the
objects that are out of place. Well what I find is where it is expected
to be, but it does not have to be. I see the drug dealers are out early.
Gotta make that cake. In between staring down ever pair of breast with a
side of ass that walks by. I walk past an addict, who can just barely
keep her eyes open, as she clutches a stack of torn paper. I wonder if
she thinks its money to get her next fix. I pass a church of which I've
have yet to see anyone enter or leave. I then I ask myself how do I fit
in the puzzle. Well I'm there, but like I said before I don't have to
be. So in time with hard work, patience, and perseverance, I can take
myself out the frame.
*****HAZELNUT*****

Work for the future

Train of thought, thoughts on the train.

Sometimes it all just hurts my brain.

Tell me what I shall gain.

As I sit here while it rains.

Does it all go in vain?

When will it cease to cause pain?

Pity, it's enough to make you go insane.

To work at this rate, should be a disgrace.
Each day I run the rat race.
I guess for the sake of renting one's space,
I will have to keep up the pace.
With hope for new opportunities to surface.
Until then this smile shall be painted in place.

Set new goals, and be bold.
Where my steps lead, in time will be told.
Thirst for knowledge, but work to stay out of the cold.
Make smart choices, to be secure when I'm old.
Pray to the most high, for my heart can never be sold.
Walk in faith of the Father, the earth is what His hands hold.

I think u should know

Men can really make you sick.  Let me rephrase that, Dogs make me sick.  Always on the hunt,  tails wagging, drooling with the tongue out the mouth.  So unattractive. Can I as a woman be respectfully appreciated for my beauty?  Gosh I wanna puke.  Do you know what an appropriate compliment is?  Well I will tell you what it is not. "Damn you have some nice lips".  Wrong, this lets me know intanlty that all you are thinking about is what those lips can do to you.  Lets try saying hello first.  Followed by, "that sure is a nice scarf your wearing".   Maybe that"s the icebreaker you need.  Because then I will tell you it's my favorite color.  Now there is a beginning of a conversation.  Show me your interents lies more than on sexual satisfaction.

Please do not stare me down. Especailly while your girlfriend or who ever she is to you, lay sleeping peacefully on your shoulder.  Now I am so not flattered. Instead, I am so uncomfortable that I want to disappear into the train seat.  You know what?  I have a back up plan, because I am too shy to tell you to get the hell out of my face.  I will get lost in the book I always have handy in my purse.  Guess what Dog?  If your paying attention you have just learned another interesting fact about me.  Besides my favorite color blue scarf, you now know I like to read.  Ding Ding Ding.  We're on a role.

So before I ramble on, here is my point.  Dogs, get a muzzle.  Please I beg you.  You know the saying.  Dogs are a mans best friend.  Maybe because you act like a dog,that is the reason you are always with the guys and not in a functional relationship. Sniffing around tramps.   Not every poodle wants her butt sniffed.  Gosh. I'm that poodle.  Don't sniff my butt until you have looked me in the eyes, and barked me a propper greeting. Thank you and goodnight.

3 is the charm

Where have you been all this time, and what planet did you come from? You must be the only sole survivor of Planet Best. You truly are the best. The rest, only a waste. No one can hold a match to you. And holding is what I intend to do. Keep you close to me, so close we become one entity, for all eternity, for all to see. I have you now, and there's no turning back. Continuing on down the right track. The start of out oneship.

The feeling is just right

A smile spread across my face.
No reason all.
Its just that I had a ball

A smile parts my lips.
Life has taken a shift.
You are the perfect gift.

A smile warms my heart.
As I rest my head your arm,
you woo me with your charm.

A smile lifts my spirits.
And no its not the wine,
having you close will do just fine.

A smile ignites my fire.
The passion that I feel.
The reciprocation is oh so real.

A smile invigorates my body.
Every limb wants you,
for as longs as our hearts stay true.

A smile lights my path.
This has to me His plan.
He is the Father,
the creator of man.

Just in general

Women: Such emotional creatures. If they're not too angry, then they're too sad, too happy, too mean. Always too something. God made us the way we are and we should embrace ourselves. Be happy with what we have. Instead we're looking over our shoulder at the next woman, and not seeing at who we are inside.

Shut out the noise around you, stop scoping the scene around you. Rolling your eyes. No more "Who she think she is?" Ask yourself "Who am I?" "What do I need?" "What do I want?" "How can I achieve my goals?" Define yourself ladies and no one else will.

Intro of a bloggless blogger

Hey it is I Hazel. Expressing who I am, showing my creative spirit, exemplifying my individuality. Writing to free my mind of all the clutterful thoughts. On these pages they explode colorfully, emotionally, and just plain me. That is all I can be, this crazy, humorous, random, ambitious, intelligent, bam damn I'm here woman. Like or leave it, but take the time to feel me. Take a ride, its free, you have nothing to loose. Maybe somethings to gain, I'm sure a laugh will be one thing. So welcome to my bloggless page, for the bloggless blogger.